Monday, October 31, 2005

If Crewcut Loses, N.D. Wins in Long Run

Now that Crewcut Charlie Weis has that fat new contract and won't be going anywhere until 2015 (yea, right), it's time to turn to a more weighty matter, namely Crewcut's body fat. A new site,, has been established to help the man become less of one. "The overall health of our program is excellent but the health of our coach is not so good." The site continues: The "next time you see Coach W. grabbing a Whopper at the BK in The Huddle, why not steer him over to the LaFortune Center Subway counter." Already, countless brave souls (including The Wizard at No. 53) have signed an online petition to encourage the man who shaped up Notre Dame football to shape up himself. Even Tyrone Willingham has signed the petition (No. 68), with some advice for Crewcut: "They love you now, Charlie. But trust me, it doesn't last."

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